Profile of Miss Chan:
Corporate ladder climber - Learning in progress
Politics queen - Good
Bootlicker - Good (when temper in check)
Bullshitting - Excellent


Would anyone like to employ me?


Chant with me.

Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick. Find a job quick.


I'm a job snob. I have no idea why. I look down on job offers from small companies.


What a dumb ass you are Miss Chan. Miss Chan, you seriously have to change your mentality becuz the work market is flooded with students from good universities with good grades, honours degrees and combined degrees. And you, with third class grades taught by third class lecturers from a second tier university with a third world smelly school canteen have no place to stand in the corporate world, maybe except in the toilet.


Life's tough, and shit is hard to swallow.


Scenarios/Impact Analysis:

Going back to ACN ---> Killing my social life softly and maybe Mr Chan will leave me becuz I neglect him ---> But hey with the money earned, maybe I can buy a virgin Vietnam or kalimantan bridegroom ---> possibility score: 5 out of 10


Internship companies (Keppel and Health Digest) ---> Not a bad choice especially for Health Digest since I will be in my element ---> I get writers' block now and then. Try writing about topics on 'Not tonight honey, I have got asthma', you will get writers' block too ---> possibility score: 4 out of 10


Job Ads ---> I have been given a pass for my resume writing assignment. That probably will mean all resumes sent out will be heading towards Recyclingville ---> Unless, I attach a sexy photo to my resume ---> possibility score: 7 out of 10


Job Agencies ---> Highest possibility of getting a job. Also highest possibility of getting a job with jobscope which is not favourable. Turning it down and risk being blacklisted by the agency ---> What?! And I GET to pay those bloodsuckers for a sucky job at a small time company? Sounds good to me... ---> possibility score: 6 out of 10


HR Classmates ---> Have to help HR specialisation classmates get a good job at a good MNC ---> Have to kiss their ass ---> Have to stop making fun of them and stop irritating them ---> possibility score: 0 out of 10 (you asking me to stop inhaling man)


Social Network ---> What?! You mean I have friends? ---> possiblity score: 0 out of 10


Getting married and being a full time housewife ---> Who is the lucky groom? Do I know him?" ---> I aint need a man to support me ---> possiblity score: 2 out of 10


Live off my family ---> My hamster is the only family I have got now and I think he will not be able to support me on sunflower seeds ---> Higher possibility of me supporting Mudpie ---> possiblity score: -10 out of 10


That sums up all possible aspects of my situation.

Choking the Chicken

Means masturbating.

At least in german movies.

German gay movies.

German gay movies where masturbating scenes are cut.

I like foreign flicks and good movies. No pacifiers or house of wax for me please*.

*read: DONT invite me to watch*

I know. I told almost everyone that I fucked up my own pc. Thats the reason why I couldnt blog after exams. yeah yeah no big deal. Shit happens all the time when I try to act clever and techy and try to be my own pc technician.

It resulted in me drowning myself in tears every night becuz I was bored to death. No internet and no blogging can really drive a girl mad. It's like going to shit without any toilet paper. I know cuz I have been there and done that.

You know I shouldnt say things like that. In case, I get to be some celebrity or CEO or president scholar in the future and the paparazzi picked up dirt like these.

It's been 12 days since I last blogged. I know. Boredom kills me everynite. Till the point where I was so bored, I have decided to hold my wedding at some club and make everyone come in clubbing wear. And that my daughter's name shall be called Meiji.

Speaking of clubbing, I have seen butch and girl make out in the toilet before. Sexy.

I love mr wei today. He didnt make me angry. And he made a bet with me that I couldn't fix my own pc.

What he didn't know is my big huge enormous ego hardly accepts defeat. esp to men. BUT I'm not a FCP! I say AGAIN.

With my big huge enormous ego in tow, pc is fine and fixed and working and I get to blog. And I get to change mr wei's name to mr Chan now.

Let's welcome the new Mr Chan who will marry into my CHAN family.

HA

HA

HA

*smug*

HA

HA

HA

From this day forth, Mr wei will be officially known as Mr CHAN. *smug*

Mr Chan will be the one having children. *smug*

Mr Chan will do housework. *smug*

Mr Chan will choke his own chicken. *smug*

Oh heaven forgive me. Absence from blogger has made me crazier.

This will be all for today. Tomorrow I will write about what has happened (in gist) in the past week. (if I can remember. if cannot then I will make something up. that works fine for me as well.)

Tomorrow I'm going to celebrate my god son's birthday. Having steamboat at my ex-best friend's house in the evening. Who cares right? So I will blog late night tml. Try my best to come home since my ex-best friend wants me to stay overnight but I have been away from home for the past 2 days. *guilty* Mothers' day coming soon. Got to spend more time with mammy.

Till then.